Finally, A Cause I Can Believe In
April 15th, 2009Tea.
It’s delicious!
Especially today, April 15th, when The People rise up against Barack Obama and his Fascist policies. And just how will they fight this scourge against nature and humanity? With cucumber and watercress sandwiches—crusts cut off, of course—and don’t forget, pinkies extended please.
Choose your weapon. Earl Gray or Sleepytime?
I like combining the idea of tea parties with another fave of mine. In my town, there is a staff person on the local newspaper who cannot resist puns. Every headline has a zanier pun than the last: “Cows, Mooove Over: Ostriches Coming to the Farm.” Or “Locking Hornes with Educators!” (The school superintendant’s name is Horne.) Let’s call this punophile Tommy Larkin.
So for National Tea Party Day, when everyone and sundry who does not have a life protests the tax cuts they’re getting (seems kind of weird to me), I have a few of my own headlines, Tommy Larkin-style:
Tea-ed Off: Golf Tournament Canceled due to Tea Party Protesters.
Tosspots Toss Tea into Potomac River, Clog Major Artery
Pack Your Bags: We’re Going on Fox News!
Brown-bagging it: We’re Going on Fox News!
Blowing Off Steam: We’re Going on Fox News!
Tea Protesters Face Steep Uphill Battle
Tempest in a Teapot: Where are the Porta Potties?
Tagged and Bagged: Naked Protester Taken to Pokey
Tax Protesters Dump Tea Bags on tarp to protest TARP
White House Cool to Hot Tea Protest
And the ever popular:
Blow on It